There are two types of people who will love Bakery Simulator, those who can't get enough of micromanagement and those who dream of opening their own bakery. I'm neither, but that doesn't mean I couldn't have a lot of fun in Bakery Simulator. At least in the beginning, before it became more or less self-playing. It starts, just like any other simulator, with a tutorial where I learn the basics of the kitchen where I will be housed in the future. This is where I as my own master chef will pick up my orders, go through the recipes for the day and of course knead plenty of dough. I control everything. Except for the dishes, thankfully. The kitchen is reset every morning. But from the time the order comes in to the time the pastries are delivered to the customer, I am solely responsible for the quality of this bakery. It's my responsibility to make sure that unhappy customers don't review me on Yelp and TripAdvisor.
But the problems start right away. Controllers are not optimal for this type of game. As with most other simulators, mouse and keyboard are probably preferable here. Especially when the stress of a really tight time frame gradually starts to kick in. I swear out loud in French,Sacrebleu! when I don't manage to cut the dough into exactly equal parts. Merde! when the buns were burnt to a crisp when the oven door couldn't be opened in time. Some of my mishaps can of course be blamed on my own poor co-ordination skills, but the majority are actually game mechanics. Something that also becomes very clear as my success increases and I can upgrade my kitchen appliances. The more automated, the less problems I have when I don't have to turn little knobs and time cooking times with a button press at exactly the right moment. Because Bakery Simulator is not only extremely detailed, it's also precision-based to the point of absurdity.
In a way, I applaud this as it adds realism to the game. It's like standing there and baking for real, especially since all the bakery products I produce are based on real recipes. On the other hand, it's like having another job. Logging off from work after a long day of project management and tight deadlines to do the same thing again, often even more stressful than at my real job, is simply not fun and just trying to get to grips with all the game segments takes time. Bakery Simulator is not something you just pick up and play for fun. It's bloody serious, from start to finish. The Dark Souls of life simulators. I have to carefully study my options, weigh the pros and cons and learn from my mistakes. If I fail, the consequences are enormous. It's not death by permaculture, but the slightest slip in quality and my reputation takes a big hit, and in case of repeated blunders, I just have to take down the sign for good. Sure, I can correct mistakes and even throw the baked goods I'm not happy with in the bin, but the clock is constantly ticking and the stress is ever-present. Exhaustion syndrome whispers in my ear "I see you." At the same time, I can't risk delivering something half-baked to customers, or they'll go crazy, so it's a constant balancing act between perfection and time management.
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It's also important to emphasise that things can go wrong in every part of the process. From picking and dosing the right ingredients to mixing them to just the right consistency. Then they have to be cut into the right size pieces, moulded and placed in the oven to be taken out at the right time. When everything is ready, they must be delivered and here the game suddenly turns into Grand Theft Auto. No, not really. It never gets that action-packed, but consider my surprise when it turned out that I had to drive the car myself in a baking simulator. Here I thought it was just a case of leaving the stuff at the door and someone picking up the box, but it's flat out through dark streets until I reach the right destination on the map. A shortcut through the park, running the red light a couple of times and pushing some poor sod off the road are all legitimate ways to get there faster and thus get a higher rating. Even here, the steering was horrible, it should be added.
The graphics are nothing to write home about. It's okay, no more, no less, but for this type of game it's about what you'd expect. Things look as they should. A ladle is a ladle and a freshly baked bun looks like a freshly baked bun, minus the best part of course, the smell. The game segment where you drive a car on the other hand. It definitely needed a little more time in the oven because we are really talking about half baked. There are games for Playstation 2 that look better. Thankfully I can upgrade to automatic delivery later in the game so I don't have to set foot in that polygonal car again, but until then it's an ocular nightmare. Then add in the terrible steering and you have a recipe for disaster. The music is worse than the lift music in any shopping centre. A terrible monotonous plinking that was immediately replaced by yours truly with a playlist on Spotify. Degevall likes kneading American radio rock so it became AOR-based with a lot of Michael Bolton, Journey, Toto and Night Ranger. Marginally better, but that you should have to change the game music at all in order not to go insane in the process is of course an underestimation no matter how you look at it.
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The further into the game I get, the more modern my kitchen becomes but my recipes also become more complex. Advanced pastries generate more money but also take longer to prepare so it's always a balancing act. Risk and reward. What do I do when an ingredient runs out? Do I order and wait for delivery or pay extra for express delivery? I am constantly faced with these kinds of quick decisions and after about eight hours of hectic baking, I can finally hang up my apron, take a breath and look forward to a long holiday, far away from burnt croissants and crooked pretzels.
